100th Post Gala Event!

That’s right, kids, this is the 100th episode of The Joseph Luster Report (as seen on blogspot, that is). I cooked up many means of celebration, debating how this monumental event should be handled.

I thought about writing a long, meaningful post about how important this web-log is to society. Upon further consideration, however, I deemed it a waste of time. This is the internet, and no one really wants to read!

Instead, I will leave you with this video of Michael Richards going buckwild at a stand-up gig, and “showin’ them black folk what’s up” as it were.

Booger Squad

Extreme cabin fever (sadly, sans Rider Strong) has been setting in here lately, and if I didn’t have a ton of work to do, I’d probably either “get a job” (haw haw!) or claw at my walls all day.

Meanwhile, people are shooting other people for PS3s to put on eBay (because they’re sure as hell not stealing them to play) and fake news stories chronicle cats fucking dogs and having doggish cat babies. Though I probably won’t get one for quite a while, I’m contemplating going out tomorrow morning and punching kids in the face for their Wii. Then I can take it downtown and wait for the first gangly hobo to say, “I’ll suck yo’ dick.”

The fact that I would be holding a game console is pretty much the only thing that makes that scenario different than any other day of my week.

I’ve decided that this is what I’m going to look like in a couple of years.