Netflix is pretty fantastic, but sometimes you get a really, really nasty disc in the mail that is in no way salvageable. A month or two ago it was a super scratched copy of Hitcher in the Dark, but today’s was much more vicious.
I gleefully opened an envelope that contained the 1984 rough-n-tougher Streets of Fire only to find what looks like a pizza pie. To be fair, the envelope itself looked like it had taken a ride down a Double Dragon conveyor belt on the way here.
I’ll be honest right up front, I never owned any of these. This is most notable because pretty much every ratty, grody toy available during my childhood rests somewhere in my basement. The Creepy Crawler and Mad Scientist lines are also significant for being somewhat of an apex for the “gross” era* of children’s toys. This isn’t to say that they were the best, but it was certainly all downhill after these.
Now kids just like to play with little big-eyed Jappernese crud; boys that look like girls that look like boys that look like girls. With that in mind, let’s take this moment to be transported back to a time when kids enjoyed concocting fake bugs, boogers, brains and, um, Power Rangers!
I love the kid at the beginning that corrects the announcer!
* Of course, I’m more referring to Toymax’s 1992 revival of CC.
Halo 3 has some pretty amazing customizable multiplayer features. My favorite by far has been this incredible pirate battle in the desert. Basically, your ships act as bases that the other team has to take over. Everyone is only equipped with a sword and a pistol, and being on the sand zaps away your shielding (so it really helps to have vehicles).
Here is a tale woven by me via the game’s theater feature.
Opposition starts flocking toward our ship
Back to the sea with you!
Their ship fast approaches ours
They waste no time unleashing their horde
Ship to ship action
I dispatch the first boarder ruthlessly
While Jimmy sneaks aboard their vessel
The last of their marauders is taken out
Blue corpse aftermath
I was just going to post a simple image of these frightful toys, but then I ran across this page at the Corinthian Marketing website. What? These made a European comeback last year? My, and how fancy they became. First the Reese’s cups and now this. What a day!
As a bonus, enjoy their animated adventure!
I think we can all make this a smashing holiday if we each agree to have Captain EO parties in our respective villas. Put on your 3-D glasses now!
Captain EO – part one
Captain EO – part two
subhumanzoids 