Boss Week II: The Slowest, Longest Week In Earth’s History, will continue, but for now, something for you to read (you have to buy it, though)!
In which I jabber about Gotham Knight and Burst Angel, among some other stuff. Also inside: lots of other cool stuff that I didn’t do!
Now, back to working. Later this week: San Diego Comic-Con.
I suspect he’ll “ne’er-do-well” once more.
Okay, here’s the deal. Any days that I don’t spend posting about bosses (or at all) are automatically credited to the overall theme, so… that means Boss Week II could potentially continue eternally!
And perhaps it should in this twisted world where a boss can comprise an entire level, becoming a world unto himself (because there are no real female bosses, come on. We’ll get into that later). Perhaps this is the ultimate form of the boss, forcing the player to traverse his frame in some bizarre pseudo-sexual ritual of virtual itch-scratching and the eventual slaughter that springs forth.
Some examples are needed, of course, lest you all consider me a lying scab on the buttocks of the Earth. Memory doesn’t always serve me perfectly, but I believe the first time I encountered such a stage-encompassing boss was in the original R-Type; level 3 to be exact. In it, the pilot of the R-9a “Arrowhead” (see: YOU) enters another horizontally-scrolling canyon, and quickly meets a large and aggressive ship peppered with turrets and rockets and boosters and smaller vessels and everything else that makes your life miserable. As you creep beyond it, it turns out…
The ship is the level!
Such a twist. A similar concept was expanded immeasurably on the release day of PS2 classic Shadow of the Colossus. In this spectacular title, however, the whole game is comprised of bosses. In remote locations of a very desolate land, our hero (see: YOU) finds towering guardians that are indeed levels unto themselves. Yet, I still don’t think the concept of “the boss as the level” has been taken to its ultimate peak.
I envision a videogame that takes place, from beginning to end, along the body of a massive final boss. Now, as each stage passes and the player continues to progress along its body, they will meet larger and larger portions of the boss that will serve as bosses themselves. Taking Shadow‘s concept as far as it can, the game is the boss, or the boss is the game, or something.
The question now is, “what lies beyond?” Or, rather, “what lies within?” Next time, let’s have a spirited chat about INNARDS!
I wanted it before, now I want it more.
http://www.gametrailers.com/remote_wrap.php?mid=36297
Boss Week(s?) II continues this week…
Without a doubt, King Koopa is one of the most notorious villains in videogame history. He’s plagued Mario and Luigi since day one, stolen Princess Peach countless times, and has been immortalized in stone in every single castle he’s called his very own.
Still, there’s gotta be some downtime for even the biggest of hero-trouncing wigs, illustrated vividly by King Koopa’s short-lived stint as the “King of Kartoons,” a position that was surely heavily contested by the REAL King of Cartoons.
Nevertheless, Koopa boldly branded himself the master of animated film frames (and the afternoon in general), and proceeded to scurry about the town proclaiming himself as such. Could it be? Will even children tread where only eagles dare? Can our youth do what Mario AND Nintendon’t? Can your fragile psyche handle the following clip of King Koopa running around and rapping about cartoons and how great he is?
subhumanzoids 