subhumanzoids

Here’s a special early morning edition of everyone’s favorite high-class online magazine!

It’s 7:30 in the morning in the fine city of Louisville, Kentucky and this intrepid reporter has been hard at work playing TV games throughout the night. But why would Sir Coco forego sleeping in favor of digital derring-dos?

It’s like asking “What if Dr. Doom had become a hero?” or “What if The Watcher stopped watching?” in that the answer may surprise you! You’d be a well-informed reader if I didn’t have to tell you that this is Derby weekend here in “The ‘Ville.” It’s times when others are the busiest that help remind me that I have no need for a normal sleeping schedule at the moment.

TV games ahoy! Our favorite dandy is working hard on God of War as you read this, thrashing nogoodniks from Mount Olympus to the briney gates of Poseidon’s keep.

Or is he?

Stay tuned for the uproarious conclusion!

Operation: Play Onimusha 2 has begun. Joseph is now only “a lot of” years behind the trends and popular outfits. Yet, he still remains a respectable dandy.

I noticed that Keita Amemiya did the character designs in this one. This, of course, made me enjoy the cock-eyed lizard men and spider-legged warriors that much more. The game is a great continuation aside ftom the awful gift-giving mechanic in employing the aid of other characters.

Utada Hikaru’s videos still make me wonder why I haven’t seen Casshern yet. Even if it’s a mess, it must look cool. I love Kazuaki Kiriya’s visual style. I really love his video for Utada’s “Keep Tryin'” single, as posted below.

Here are some entertainment quickies:

We finally got around to wrapping up season two of Battlestar Galactica, and I can effectively say that the second season is a shadow of what the first achieved in every way. I don’t even know where to start without taking up a lot of space, so I won’t. At this point, convincing me that it’s “The smartest show on TV” would be like telling a paraplegic to “just start walking, pussy.” Oh well, whatever. It was a fun show for the most part.

Thief, which is incidentally one of television’s current crop of amazing shows that justifies my being so harsh on BSG, already had its season finale tonight but we missed it. I hope a lot of people are watching this show. It’s worth it just to see Andre Brauer act in it.

I am getting this movie as we speak. Don’t worry, little Johnny boy, we’ll get some warm milk and a big blanket and watch this bad mofo together.

WHAT’S THAT, EARTH MAN? YOU WANT MORE?

I “solved” Kingdom Hearts II tonight. This is the best sequel in recent memory. It’s such a vast improvement over the first and as such stands as one of the PS2’s finest games. The last battle was epic in the way that reminded me of those rad pompous bosses in old games like Shinobi that would just sit in a throne and fight you.

Of course, that feature only rang true for one or two of the ba-goddamn-zillion forms the final boss assumed.

I only got 90% completion, but I didn’t think the mostly lame minigames were worth trudging through just to see the “secret ending,” so I peeped it on YouTube. If you don’t ever plan on bothering with KHII, you should check out this video, if not just to see some brief and rad CG.

How do you even follow up a Ducketts Murda Records music video promo? A meeker man would shrug and say “you can’t” just before packing his bags and fading away in black and orange ashes on the sun’s surface.

Maybe that man is right, but he’s dead now and we have to move on. The 48 Hour Film Project is expanding to Louisville for the first time this year, and it’s the duty of Bigwig Productions to completely dominate it. I think I’ve already talked to everyone locally that reads this (there is merely one), but this is a heads up anyway.

This movie was apparently the winner of the overall competition in 2005. It is terrible and there was almost no actual filming done as it’s filled primarily with old stock photographs of the west.

Here’s a promo for the upcoming Ducketts Murda “Punch Out” music video!

Having trouble with the player? Here’s the link to the page.